Cheers

Unable to sleep. I fell a sleep for 15 minutes then Treyton woke me up....and here I am with thoughts of my life running through my mind. I look at my life...and I think I believed in God and Jesus since I was young, I say I think...because now I KNOW I believe in God giving his own son to die on a cross for our sins and be resurrected so that we may have eternal life in heaven. I feel it with every ounce of my being. I feel his love, I feel passion and love for God. I can see that without God I would be full of anger, hate, bitterness and instead I have qualities of God, kindness, forgiveness, compassion and love for people. Even th people that have hurt me badly....I don't wish them pain, I forgive them, pray for them and try to understand that they were hurt as children too. For some reason God has saved me from that crap and allowed me to not be like them. I am so forever grateful to God for that. I feel my life in so many ways is evidence that God exists. I did believe in the simple truth there was a God and a Jesus...I just don't think I understood....the depth of that....that he gave up his son...for me...this mess of a person and that he could save me, save me from my hurts, that he could love me, forgive me and let me into his heavenly home when he deems my time on earth is done. I don't think I understood that, not that I can completely grasp it now either. Now looking back I can see where God was in all my hurts...right there with me helping me get out. I can't help but have this passion to help people know his love and know that he is pursuing them and that he is jealous for their love and attention. I still need a mountain, an outlet, I want someone to know that healing can happen and it happens through Christ. I am so excited for this weekend....might be a mountain in more ways than one....one to conquer and two to shout from and three to celebrate Christ from!!!!

My goals...to wake up daily saying "God Use me, all day, everyday, don't let me sweat the small stuff", to take shame out of abuse, to let people know healing can happen, to help people know about God and his son, to live each day to the fullest, with forgiveness, compassion, and God's love shining through me, to be humbled. I am just a body for God to use...a temple....if someone had said "my body is a temple" a year ago....I would probably would of thought they had lost their minds. But here I am using that sentence, comprehending it, that my body is for God's purpose, to do his work. My experiences are for character building, he's giving me tools to do his work. CRAZY that my God, our God, thinks I/we can do his work...that we are worthy of his love! I am just amazed, I am just at the beginning of grasping this stuff...I can't wait to learn more, to love more, to pray more, to grow more! Cheers to living life for God!